I have 5 brothers

Say it with me people, Yikes.

The following is a list of injuries they have incurred in the past few years that I know of/remember. This list of course does not include the things they have blown up/wrecked/sunk/etc.

  • broken main wrist bone
  • blown off top of finger with a roman candle
  • black eyes
  • badly cut one finger and nearly lost another with a saw
  • broken collarbones
  • broken nose (i think)
  • debris in eyes
  • head injuries involving the emergency room
  • stitches for cuts
  • multiple injuries of varying degrees requiring emergency care from multiple motorcycle accidents.
  • some minor injuries from car accidents.
  • slamming a head into a dumpster via a longboard and no helmet.
  • (this doesn’t really count, but:) shot someone in the leg.
  • broken foot.
  • multiple fight wounds from multiple fights.
  • burns
  • back problems after ¬†getting sat on by a fat man in a fight.

here’s the worst part: the vast majority of those accidents involved the two oldest boys. Translation: my parents are going to need a frequent flyer discount at the emergency room–it’s only just begun.

Standard