The Sauce Stashers


You’ve seen them…furtively grabbing hand fulls of hot sauce packets for their lonely little taco, using one and then shoving the rest in their pockets. Men in power suits with a laptop, old women with flowers on their hat, little kids with big pockets in their baggy jeans. All of them–sauce stashers. It’s not stealing if they’re free, right? I think our personal record is…a ton. literally, almost a ton. You see, I am a sauce stasher. I wasn’t always this way, until once upon a time I got married to a shameless sauce stasher who had perfected the snatch, stash, and dash routine with the local Taco Bell. At first I resisted his advances to put his hand-fulls of sauce in my purse for our “lunch” (and dinner, and lunch, and dinner, and…) but when I realized that doing so meant I was walking out of Taco Bell next to a man with bulging pockets and hands full of sauce packets, and that Taco Bell sauce makes amazing quesadillas at home….well, lets just say I’m one of them now.